How to Understand Your Boredom and Break Free

What drives boredom will surprise you.

Key points

• Boredom springs from an internal state of tension and a nagging wish to be saved from yourself.
• It often drives destructive decisions, such as unhealthy relationships or drug use.
• External stimulation may divert our attention from boredom, but boredom reappears because its true source is unresolved.
• Some ways to resolve boredom include creativity, tension outlets, and acts of service.

“I’m bored.”

Someone announces boredom, and we barely notice. It’s a phrase used so frequently by friends, loved ones, or strangers that it barely registers.

What kind of boredom is it? A call for help? An expression of fatigue? A form of blame?

The internal world of boredom

Boredom springs from an internal state of tension, a passive approach to frustration loaded with meaning. Rather than investigating boredom and focusing on what’s generating it, we often seek external stimulation for distraction. Entertainment may divert our attention, but boredom will reappear and torment us again because its true source is unaddressed.

Underneath boredom is a nagging wish to be saved from yourself. This wish frequently drives destructive behaviors and reckless decisions, such as unhealthy relationships, drug and alcohol abuse, and dangerous risk-taking (see “Signs You Need a Lifestyle Change”).

Naturally, seeking external relief works. Unfortunately, the relief is short-lived. We haven’t successfully addressed the internal state generating feelings of boredom.

The symptom of boredom

Here are some very enlightening perspectives about boredom to consider:

“She refused to be bored chiefly because she wasn’t boring.” —Zelda Fitzgerald

“If we find life boring, it might be because we’ve let ourselves become boring.” —Daisaku Ikeda

“The cure for boredom is curiosity.” —Dorothy Parker

“To be bored is an insult to oneself.” —Jules Renard

“Boredom: the desire for desires.” —Leo Tolstoy

These brilliant minds have come to the same conclusion: Boredom is self-generated, so it must be self-relieved.

How to approach boredom

To break your reactive response to boredom, start by digging in and investigating what’s behind the feeling of boredom. What unrelieved frustration are you avoiding? How can you convert boredom into fuel for self-generated creative solutions?

For example, I felt bored moments before I started writing this article. For me, “feeling bored” signals from my unconscious that I’m starving for creativity. It usually points to several specific causes:

• I’ve been spending too much time consuming media.
• I’m stuck in a rut of repeating the same routines.
• I’m feeling burnt out and need to recharge.
• I’m ignoring my body and not practicing good self-care.

Ways to convert boredom into fuel for growth

To break free of boredom, consider these actions:

1. Turn your boredom into creativity.

Write, draw, paint, dance… boredom is easily vanquished by creativity.

2. Turn off your phone and ditch social media.

Stop passively consuming media. It doesn’t replenish, inspire, or motivate. Most often, it’s a distraction from your unaddressed frustration.

3. Start a meditation practice.

Exploring your internal states, observing your mind, and getting curious about the source of your boredom is the path toward freeing yourself from it.

4. Perform acts of service.

Narcissism fuels boredom. Take a break from obsessing over your problems and lend a helping hand to someone in need. Group therapy is also a good way to foster empathy and break free of isolation.

5. Find tension outlets.

Boredom frequently is an expression of unrelieved physical tension that fuels obsession, rumination, and, you guessed it—boredom (see “9 Ways to Cure Your Own Depression”).